Hurricane Harvey is here…and I have some time on my hands. So, here it goes.
Junior high…Jesus? Is he real? My family is all at church together. One by one, they step out into the aisle to be baptized, lead by my father. I am baptized on that day in 1978. I “believe”…I think.
Twenties…Jesus? Yes. I am married in the church in 1987. I have three children, ages 8, 6 and 3; and I am trying my best to raise them in the church knowing Him. I am thankful for my blessings. I have been a working mom and a stay-at-home mom. But so often, I feel like there is something missing, something more than just not having my husband “there for me.”
Fast forward to 1999…I am struggling. I believe. I know He is real. But so many obstacles in life have left me uncertain of what to do with that belief. I want to actually “receive” Him. I want that relationship with Him. I needed to learn the way to receiving. Thankfully, He directed me to a bible study, Experiencing God; and in the bible study, He showed me how to begin that relationship with Him, one day at a time, through reading His word, through prayer, the circumstances in my life and going to church and hearing His word. I needed to “receive” the Holy Spirit and open my heart up to Him. And that’s just what I did, June of 1999, sitting in my rocker in my bedroom on a bright, sunny day. I rededicated my life. I wanted to live for Him. I wanted Him to show me the way. And He did.
Two years later, in September of 2001, I needed Him more than I needed air. And He was there. It was 3:00 a.m., my son’s grim diagnosis was looming and I was desperate…and then there was the light bulb. He showed up deep in my soul. And He gave me hope to face the next day. Hope beyond living and breathing here on this earth.
Ten months later, in August of 2002, again, it’s 3:00 a.m. and I am desperate. Living and breathing here on this earth was coming to an end for my child, and Jesus showed up deep in my soul. He was there. I opened my heart. I cried out for Him. He was just down the hall, waiting for me to trust Him. I opened my heart as I opened my arms. I felt him as he moved closer down the hall toward me. I gave Him back my son, and He took him home.
I have struggled so much since that night 15 years ago…but one thing has remained true. I still believe. I believe in the Father, I believe in the Son, I believe in the Holy Spirit…and I believe I will see my son again.
SAFE IN THE ARMS OF JESUS AND I WILL SEE MY PRECIOUS ANGEL IN HEAVEN
I am so grateful today that Jesus is my Savior and my guidepost. There are so many things I have no control over. And that’s okay…because I have Jesus. I know He is always on my side. And thank goodness…without Him, there is no telling what I may say or do to some people! Just kidding…well, sort of.
Seriously, though…believing despite your circumstances, believing when your prayers do not get answered, believing when you are made to feel like the outsider among your friends and even your family, believing even when your foundation is stripped away…that’s Jesus. That’s the Holy Spirit working inside of you.
It’s “A Case for Christ”….I just watched it on this rainy, Hurricane Harvey kind of day; and I am reminded just how much I love Jesus and just how thankful I am for His promises. And I am reminded just how I got here. I wanted to experience God in a real way in my life…and He showed up.
And He will show you the way, too, my friend, if you want, through reading His word, through the circumstances in your life, through prayer and/or through church. Some of the best moments of my life are sitting in my sweet spot reading and listening to Him.
I definitely don’t have all the answers, that’s for sure. But if you need a little help like I did trying to figure out how to have that relationship, just do what I did, one day at a time, reading His word, doing a bible study, praying to Him, and just trusting Him with your life. He won’t let you down…I promise!
Okay, Harvey, now go away! We don’t want you here anymore!
Please be safe out there, my friends.